On Local Men

Here is what my site mate Sarah wrote on the topic of local men. This is what we deal with on a daily basis, and why i chose to spend a chunk of my own money to get internet at home. Enjoy:

Observation On The Male Species

by Sarah Choy

Whether it be standing on street corners practicing their staring skills, following me from one end of town to the other grunting, trying to run me over with their speeding Ladas, throwing me random crude comments while I pass on the opposite side of the street, demanding for what I’m selling whilst grabbing at my pack, or sitting at the popular man made habitat/internet cafe for hours on end looking at porn for free because they are the buddy of the guy that works there, I have developed a strong dislike towards the male species in this country—maybe even borderline hate.
Side Note: Yes, I’ve had my share of negative experiences with the dominate populous here, but I’ve also met a few good men. For example, I have enormous amounts of respect for everyone at PCHQ and a good 2 in my surrounding environment.
The following are my observational notes…
Entry 612 [sometime last week in the year 2008]: The other day I ventured into the popular man made habitat with an intention of emailing my family after avoiding the outside world farther than the distance from my house to my work. At the internet café in Barda there are three “boys” that work there at varying hours in the day, if they aren’t at the çay xanas giggling and gawking. Usually I chose to pay a visit to the net in the morning hours when the environment is calmer and less dense with the male species. I would normally call or message Sean Paul, the morning worker and the most predictable of the three, to make sure he’s there because I hate standing on the street at the door to the net while people start drifting closer and closer to me as I wait. It was late afternoon by the time I decided to go the net. The guy working at that hour looks like he’s 12, but observation proves him to be older. All three computers were occupied, and one of them by the guy working there. I waited about an hour along the walls reading a book and occasionally glancing up to check on any movement from the boys. Finally the internet guy got up from his dwellings and calls me towards the computer signalling he was finished. I pack my book away and cautiously made my way over. I sit down and his hand is still on the mouse looking at me. I look onto the screen and there is a video of a girl on her knees giving a blow job to a headless body. I roll my eyes and open my bag to dig out my USB. I think to myself if he was done why did he not close the window? One of the many why questions I wonder about the species. I see his face curl into a seedy smirk and it hits me that he wanted to see my reaction to the video. After what seemed like an eternity as he waited for a reaction from me, he finally closed the window, put in the password for me to access the internet and went on his way. But this was only the beginning. Shortly afterwards he sits with another customer/friend/non-paying boy and they start giggling trying to get my attention. From being in the Peace Corps I’ve been working on my ignoring and jading skills. Being American that wasn’t really that difficult because I have the ability to focus on the tasks at hand. Then he strikes up a cigarette and blows a few puffs into my face as he gets up walking towards me. My peripheral vision indicated him throwing another smirk my way. I thought it best to not acknowledging anything around me and experiment what the species may do next and hoping he will loose interest in me and leave me alone. I probably seemed like an empty shell, or as a person living in my own bubble to him. And as I observed him I saw a freak in a glass box and noted his many attempts at annoying the foreigner who ventured into his environment. Eventually he walked outside and had gathered a handful of friends to join him in the café. Nearly 15 minutes passed with what some may define as heckling, I bid my family adieu and left the café after slamming 60 qəpik on the computer table as if I had enjoyed the display of immaturity I received. This experience is similar to many that I’ve encountered over nearly two years living in this strange environment. Thus my expectations of the male species no longer surprise me and I often let it fester in the natural habitat. This is maybe the decided reason why I dislike the dominate populous and choose now to avoid them at all costs. If there are some decent males out there in the community, they have yet to provide evidence of themselves to me.

On a positive note, even though what Sarah wrote is routine, i have met a number of wonderful men who never cease to surprise me:

1. My old host dad, Arif, who tells me stories of his life in Russia, would take on any disrespectful Azeri, and jumps at the opportunity to help me when in need.
2. Internet guy Shanpal, the only guy working at the cafe who would kick out anyone that is disrespectul to us and immediately give up his computer so we can get on the internet.
3. Taxi driver, Yadegar, who always feeds me at the rest stop between Barda and Baku,and finds me a nice driver if he happens to be busy.
4. Any men working for AIM, a great NGO which does a ton for the community projects, such as tree plantings, trash pick ups, and other environmental campaigns.
5. My landlord, who knows that i need to be left alone, yet when i have a problem with the house, he fixes it for free!
6. The 2 deputy directors at school, who make sure that no kid ever disrespects me.
7. The store owner, who always undercharges me by 20 qepic.
8. The neighborhood 15 year old, who always walks me places and shows me where to get the cheapest amenities.
   
9. And of course all the men working at the Peace Corps office!